August 25, 2015 – a
Tuesday. Yesterday, both boys went back to school. This time, however they were
both official elementary school students. This is something that seemed like
nothing but a distant dream for so many years. Oh, they grow up so quickly, I
have been told. It is hard to imagine that while chasing after little boys,
cleaning up cracker crumbs and folding endless stacks of laundry. Yet, it
happened to us.
My first thought – we did it! We
did it! Through the grace of God we have kept them alive and well enough to
attend school! This actually happened. Oh, high-five us! Great job! Great job!
Then, the second thought came
rolling in. Oh, well, I did think
that Sister would be here by now. That, I would not yet have to walk out of
that school alone, clutching my purse like it was the last warm roll at a fancy restaurant. I did not
expect to leave those boys of mine and then exit the school only to drive home
and hear nothing. It was quiet – my favorite sound (!), but this time it was
kind of sad. The beauty that waits for us in Uganda, she is not here yet. I am
missing my little side-kick even more now that I do not have to listen to her
brothers all day. New strange feeling….
Third thought (well, actually
more like a pondering), and this one has actually been here for a while but I
have been ignoring it. Why is this taking so long, God? When will we be able to
go get her? When can she come home? But, even before that, when will we hear
some news – good, positive news regarding her case? Lord, we long to bring this
child home , to love and raise her as our own. She is already ours in our
hearts, Lord, how long must we wait? This month I have been extra anxious, as I have known that the
dear lady who runs the Baby Home where Sister resides will be going to there
for a visit. This promises nothing, except for the fact that she also wants to
send sweet sister home to us and promised to help out, if at all possible.
I formerly never knew the pain
one can endure when waiting so long. But here are a few things that I have learned:
1 .I am learning how to be “long
suffering”. I have often heard that it was good, favorable to God, in fact, to
be “long-suffering”. And, I have always thought to myself, “well, that sounds
awful”. And, well, it can be. What's important here is to cling to the only One who can save you. Hang on tight and do not let go. This is a trust-growth-thingy. This will be a GREAT story when I survive this and live to tell about it. Really. But for now, just hanging on.
2. When I wake up now, I look
forward to every single day. Maybe, this
is the day that we will hear some good news. Perhaps, today we will see a new photo. See, it’s exciting! I focus on the “
maybe today’s”, not on the, “well that didn’t happens."
3. We are positive people, who
look forward to positive things. Why spend all day whining about what is not,
when you have so much to look forward to? Not me, not us, no time. Sure, I want
her here and I really want it now. However, negativity never moved anything
along. We prefer to stay positive, focusing on God’s promises. Yes, we grieve
for her, love her, miss her, and want her here. But, we choose to believe and
stay positive.
4. This long-suffering deal has
really beefed up our patience muscles. This is absolutely NOT what I would have
asked for; however, we are always given what we need. Yay. Sigh. No, really,
patience was never my strong point and I still may have a long road ahead;
however, we have no choice but to slow down and wait. Somehow this process is a
sort of strength. Again, this was NOT on my wish list, but I am trying to make
good use of this gift.
5. We really, really, truly are
excited for other people who are adopting. Often we get the feeling that people
may not want to share their exciting news about their children or their
adoption journey, in fear that it will make us sad. No need to not share, we
really want to hear about it and cheer you on! It is uplifting to continue to
hear such great stories and such positive news. Adoption, I have learned, is
just like having a child with Cystic Fibrosis (our oldest son, Olaf, has this
illness); every single case is different. So regardless of how long or how fast
your journey is, they are all different. We honestly love to hear of others
contemplating, in-the-middle-of, or about to bring home children whom they have
adopted. It does our hearts good.
Please join us in fervent
prayer for good news regarding our daughter. We need a miracle. Please, pray
for circumstances to shift so that we may bring her some soon. We did get 4 new
pictures of her today and boy did that do our hearts good! She is growing,
looks healthy and happy and is enjoying the new My Little Pony doll that we sent
her. We are stuck in this place of long-suffering at the moment; however, we
choose to continue to praise the One who can deliver us all from this
Thank you for traveling this
journey with us.
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